In this mind-expanding episode of The Deep Shift, Lillian Eve Moore unpacks the deeper mechanics behind why some emotional wounds and recurring life patterns remain stuck—despite all our healing work. The answer? Polarity. Lillian explains how psychological and energetic problems are held in place by unconscious identification with only one side of a polarized pattern. Whether it’s a wound like abandonment, a behavior like people-pleasing, or even addiction cycles, the missing half of the problem is often what we refuse to see, feel, or acknowledge. This episode is an invitation into radical awareness, nervous system sovereignty, and a totally different way of processing internal conflicts—not by trying to fix or override them, but by expanding your ability to feel the whole truth of your experience.
Polarity Holds Patterns in Place
Every unresolved issue is stuck because we’re only looking at half of it—the half we identify with, prefer, or feel justified in.
Unseen Poles = Hidden Power
Freedom and transformation come when we acknowledge the other pole: the part we’re resisting, rejecting, or unconscious of.
Examples of Common Polarity Traps:
Abandonment wound: Identifying as anxious or neglected while ignoring the subconscious preference for chaos or control.
People-pleasing: Identifying as self-sacrificing while disowning hidden resentment or unconscious manipulation.
Addiction/rollercoaster patterns: Mistaking the “high” as good and the “crash” as bad, instead of seeing the full loop as the real issue.
The Nervous System is Addicted to Familiarity
We are wired to repeat patterns that match our familiar emotional chemistry—even if those patterns hurt us.
Feeling Is Sovereignty
The way out is not always through action—but through sitting with sensation, without assigning immediate meaning. Regulation > reaction.
4-Step Practice for Breaking the Cycle:
Awareness: Pause and identify when you’re stuck in a familiar pattern.
Curiosity: Ask what the opposite pole might be—especially the one you reject.
Sensation: Feel what arises without trying to “fix” it. Just be present.
Discernment & Action: Only after full awareness should you apply insight or make a decision.